its quite natural for us human beings to zone off once in a while... when we get bored, or we become totally engrossed in what we're doing, we sorta shut off the world and detach ourselves from everything else that's going on around us.
but... that's not the case with me...
i've been zoning out quite frequently for the past few weeks. there are times that i seem catatonic to others, without my knowledge. i don't respond; not because i don't want to, but because i don't KNOW that i have to.
i think my spirit's floating off into the next world.
*freakiest instances where this phenomena can be observed:
-on the night of the 27th of December, my elder sister and I stayed up late to make a special greeting card for our father. We slept in her room that night, and planned to wake up early the following day to catch our dad before he went to work so that we can greet him properly. I set the alarm at 6:00 am, and before I went to sleep, I checked the clock again to make sure the alarm was set. ...I woke up at 7:20 a.m. the following day. I panicked, and saw that my sister was also still sleeping. I gently [okay, that's a sarcasatic remark but... :)) ] awakened her and told her that we were late. she said that the alarm woke her up, and she tried to rouse me, but no amount of pinching and prodding would get me up and about, so she went back to sleep. ...now, I'm known to be one of the lighest sleepers in our house. A soft noise would rouse me instantly. HOW COULD I NOT BE WOKEN UP BY A FREAKIN' ALARM??
-just a while ago I was writing my Jane Eyre paper for English. My ate claims that she went in and demanded that I help her cook carbonara for the guests downstairs, and that I didn't respond to this request [another sarcastic term/remark :)) ] at all. ...I have no recollection of this incident...
shhh-ite! i'm dying... i'm dying... i'm dying... and soon i'll be dead.
I'd rather be thin than famous.
—Jack Kerouac [one of Sumire's favorite writers. <<==a character in Haruki Murakami's Sputnik Sweetheart] [and just for the record, i totally agree with Jack]
definitely no longer searching for utopia, an ergaslophobic student and aspiring thespian, a true blue Filipina and Assumptionist, existing in a state of utter discombobulation, *BROKE*, and fattening myself up in time for the next human sacrifice ritual in tondo, manila...
Stars and Nebulas
aLi
bea
cathy
caMs
[[twinstaR]]
[[fRienD]]
kaTrina
gaDDi
iSSa
jOnesie
[[myky]]
[[nica]]
pam
[[stephie]]
synty
[[tasia]]
trizza
wissa
Flight
Alanis Morissette
Carbon Stereoxide Studio Notes
Cold Play
Dashboard Confessional
Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind
Haruki Murakami
Milk&Cereal
Miss Saigon
Paulo Coelho
Rent - the Musicale
Shawn Mullins
System of a Down
The Simpsons
The Sims
The Used
::Credits::
Image By:
|j3concepts|
Layout By:
|Niknoi|
||December 2004
|January 2005
|February 2005
|March 2005
|April 2005
|May 2005
|June 2005
==:::A Few Friendly Reminders from your Resident Sane Psycho:::==
life is an unequivocally fast paced string of events, where the essence of a lifetime can be captured in a single breath, love can develop in a second, and where a long journey can feel like just another ride in the metro rail...
so put on your pink tinted glasses, wear your cheesiest smile. life's too short and much too precious to waste with the frivolities of a shallow existence.
let's limbo!
change is the only constant thing in life.
though it is most difficult to cope with change, we must.
it is survival. it is evolution.
but then again,
what if this change is brought about by paranormal sensations and emotions, unforeseen circumstances, hormonal imbalances, and... the weather?
what if this change is caused by things that are not things. forces that are immaterial?
how do we cope?
how do we end the relentless and crazed see-saw of intense emotions churning deep within us?
how do we stop misery?
how do we prolong happiness?
with a four millimeter bullet?
with a cup of peppermint-tasting cyanide?
with prayer?
i don't know.
i can't even begin to pretend to know, or to comprehend.
and i'm sure,
neither can you.
and it scares me.
it scares us.
that this we cannot understand.
everything else --science, mathematics, ratios, proportions, wars, peace talks, chocolate sprinkles and gum drops, ponies and rabbits, Nobel awards-- we know.
but this,
this simple shift of light and darkness,
this slight distinction,
this sudden rearranging of matter, molecules, and sensations.
this indescribable phenomena.
this we cannot even begin to grasp.
illogical, senseless, strange, odd.
fleeting, momentous, gargantuan, colossal.
what is the meaning behind this change in mood? in feeling?
what is the real root? the common cause?
perhaps we have been doomed to be this way.
to not understand.
to be left in the dark.
doomed to be able to adapt with everything else but this simple swing.
this simplistic issue.
never to find a way to evolve around it.
but perhaps.... in this case,
evolution is not survival.
for if you can just grin and bear it.
take it for what it is.
let go of the logic behind it.
perhaps then, survival is possible.
change is not imperative.
accepting is a prerogative, the answer, the key.