apparently, the note attached to the outer portion of the pink envelope i asked her to hand to nikki had been unintentionally removed. so there's a huge chance that nikki does not know what to do with the pink envelope, ergo the ip not reaching my group, and the other reminders not reaching corresponding people-to-remind.
sigh...
hoping for the best right now.
in an hour, i'll know. if the envelope ever left nikki's hands anyway.
after mum shook me to temporary consciousness, i snuggled back in bed. it was already 9 o'clock when next i opened my eyes.
i was awakened by the sound of the phone ringing.
first thought that came to my mind: ...this cannot be!
and then: ...oh my gulay, may phone and internet na ulit!!
seems like the guys down in PLDT finally hauled their asses up here to fix our phone lines. hallelujah. hrrm... still not a hundred percent robust. feeling a bit naseous, and i constantly want to throw up. temperature's gone down to a thirty seven. [sigh]
've been in my room for the most part of the day. just sleeping and resting, and occasionally sitting up to drink water or my meds. ugh. being sick can be fun [coz you get to be absent] but when you're a 16 year old third year student with a lotta responsibilities, it sorta brings about chilling bouts of paranoia.
i hope jonesie doesn't hate me right now. hrmpppphh... hoping, hoping, hoping.
ughhhh. the way i'm feeling right now, i'd rather jump off a wall and shatter into a million pieces. ...and i wouldn't give a flying shite if all the kings horses and all the kings men couldn't put meekah together again.
things to do:
1. study for algeb test
2. study for the quiz [was too sick to do this yesterday]
3. complete power point presentation for the ip defense
4. read world history things
5. do all the other assignments given today that i still do not know of.
"I have seen,
I have been to places
Far and deep in my mind,
Only to find,
Comfort in your strangeness..."
-Cynthia Alexander
definitely no longer searching for utopia, an ergaslophobic student and aspiring thespian, a true blue Filipina and Assumptionist, existing in a state of utter discombobulation, *BROKE*, and fattening myself up in time for the next human sacrifice ritual in tondo, manila...
Stars and Nebulas
aLi
bea
cathy
caMs
[[twinstaR]]
[[fRienD]]
kaTrina
gaDDi
iSSa
jOnesie
[[myky]]
[[nica]]
pam
[[stephie]]
synty
[[tasia]]
trizza
wissa
Flight
Alanis Morissette
Carbon Stereoxide Studio Notes
Cold Play
Dashboard Confessional
Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind
Haruki Murakami
Milk&Cereal
Miss Saigon
Paulo Coelho
Rent - the Musicale
Shawn Mullins
System of a Down
The Simpsons
The Sims
The Used
::Credits::
Image By:
|j3concepts|
Layout By:
|Niknoi|
||December 2004
|January 2005
|February 2005
|March 2005
|April 2005
|May 2005
|June 2005
==:::A Few Friendly Reminders from your Resident Sane Psycho:::==
life is an unequivocally fast paced string of events, where the essence of a lifetime can be captured in a single breath, love can develop in a second, and where a long journey can feel like just another ride in the metro rail...
so put on your pink tinted glasses, wear your cheesiest smile. life's too short and much too precious to waste with the frivolities of a shallow existence.
let's limbo!
change is the only constant thing in life.
though it is most difficult to cope with change, we must.
it is survival. it is evolution.
but then again,
what if this change is brought about by paranormal sensations and emotions, unforeseen circumstances, hormonal imbalances, and... the weather?
what if this change is caused by things that are not things. forces that are immaterial?
how do we cope?
how do we end the relentless and crazed see-saw of intense emotions churning deep within us?
how do we stop misery?
how do we prolong happiness?
with a four millimeter bullet?
with a cup of peppermint-tasting cyanide?
with prayer?
i don't know.
i can't even begin to pretend to know, or to comprehend.
and i'm sure,
neither can you.
and it scares me.
it scares us.
that this we cannot understand.
everything else --science, mathematics, ratios, proportions, wars, peace talks, chocolate sprinkles and gum drops, ponies and rabbits, Nobel awards-- we know.
but this,
this simple shift of light and darkness,
this slight distinction,
this sudden rearranging of matter, molecules, and sensations.
this indescribable phenomena.
this we cannot even begin to grasp.
illogical, senseless, strange, odd.
fleeting, momentous, gargantuan, colossal.
what is the meaning behind this change in mood? in feeling?
what is the real root? the common cause?
perhaps we have been doomed to be this way.
to not understand.
to be left in the dark.
doomed to be able to adapt with everything else but this simple swing.
this simplistic issue.
never to find a way to evolve around it.
but perhaps.... in this case,
evolution is not survival.
for if you can just grin and bear it.
take it for what it is.
let go of the logic behind it.
perhaps then, survival is possible.
change is not imperative.
accepting is a prerogative, the answer, the key.