I am effin’ lonely.
Must be the weather… though the arctic temperature has its perks [e.g. conducive to sleeping the day away instead of slaving around, the best time to eat mushroom soup while watching nonsensical television programs, etcetera, etcetera…] it also has severely depressing effects ==> one of which: it triggers the dreadfully miserable sensation called LONELINESS. Uggh. Nasty business… this lonesome-nimity thing-a-ma-jig. I guess when you’ve experienced the natural high of being “in love,” no other level or kind of happiness could compare.
I am effin’ lonely.
we had a ‘debate’ in world history today… about globalization. Was totally not prepared for it as: 1. I am muchos muchos the worst debater in the history of the freakin universe. 2. I have no idea what the specifs associated with globalization are. Nearly cried… wala lang… bullies! Mwahahaha…
a lot of teachers were absent tah-day. Momentary whoop-di-doo for everyone as we spent the periods wasting away…
there really isn’t much to tell. Or maybe its because I’ve lost all interest in life. Life has become a series of meaningless little stunts that do not in any way bear even a hint of significance and value. Life has become rigorous, insipid, and wearisome. Trapped in a schedule that repeats its self in a redundant and monotonic droll that threatens to stretch on towards the recesses of an unexciting term of eternity… my dreams have ceased to exist.
I wish I could just live life as one big hallucination. One wispy moment to the next… I wouldn’t mind being crazy because then I can escape.
Mergwawah.
“Why do I fall in love with every woman I see that shows me the least bit of attention?” –Joel in ‘Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind’
definitely no longer searching for utopia, an ergaslophobic student and aspiring thespian, a true blue Filipina and Assumptionist, existing in a state of utter discombobulation, *BROKE*, and fattening myself up in time for the next human sacrifice ritual in tondo, manila...
Stars and Nebulas
aLi
bea
cathy
caMs
[[twinstaR]]
[[fRienD]]
kaTrina
gaDDi
iSSa
jOnesie
[[myky]]
[[nica]]
pam
[[stephie]]
synty
[[tasia]]
trizza
wissa
Flight
Alanis Morissette
Carbon Stereoxide Studio Notes
Cold Play
Dashboard Confessional
Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind
Haruki Murakami
Milk&Cereal
Miss Saigon
Paulo Coelho
Rent - the Musicale
Shawn Mullins
System of a Down
The Simpsons
The Sims
The Used
::Credits::
Image By:
|j3concepts|
Layout By:
|Niknoi|
||December 2004
|January 2005
|February 2005
|March 2005
|April 2005
|May 2005
|June 2005
==:::A Few Friendly Reminders from your Resident Sane Psycho:::==
life is an unequivocally fast paced string of events, where the essence of a lifetime can be captured in a single breath, love can develop in a second, and where a long journey can feel like just another ride in the metro rail...
so put on your pink tinted glasses, wear your cheesiest smile. life's too short and much too precious to waste with the frivolities of a shallow existence.
let's limbo!
change is the only constant thing in life.
though it is most difficult to cope with change, we must.
it is survival. it is evolution.
but then again,
what if this change is brought about by paranormal sensations and emotions, unforeseen circumstances, hormonal imbalances, and... the weather?
what if this change is caused by things that are not things. forces that are immaterial?
how do we cope?
how do we end the relentless and crazed see-saw of intense emotions churning deep within us?
how do we stop misery?
how do we prolong happiness?
with a four millimeter bullet?
with a cup of peppermint-tasting cyanide?
with prayer?
i don't know.
i can't even begin to pretend to know, or to comprehend.
and i'm sure,
neither can you.
and it scares me.
it scares us.
that this we cannot understand.
everything else --science, mathematics, ratios, proportions, wars, peace talks, chocolate sprinkles and gum drops, ponies and rabbits, Nobel awards-- we know.
but this,
this simple shift of light and darkness,
this slight distinction,
this sudden rearranging of matter, molecules, and sensations.
this indescribable phenomena.
this we cannot even begin to grasp.
illogical, senseless, strange, odd.
fleeting, momentous, gargantuan, colossal.
what is the meaning behind this change in mood? in feeling?
what is the real root? the common cause?
perhaps we have been doomed to be this way.
to not understand.
to be left in the dark.
doomed to be able to adapt with everything else but this simple swing.
this simplistic issue.
never to find a way to evolve around it.
but perhaps.... in this case,
evolution is not survival.
for if you can just grin and bear it.
take it for what it is.
let go of the logic behind it.
perhaps then, survival is possible.
change is not imperative.
accepting is a prerogative, the answer, the key.