tuesday after classes - found out that a lotta our batchmates were migrating to canada/the states for senior year. deng. isa-isa nang umaalis ang mga taong mahalaga sa aming batch. senior year wouldn't be the same without em. and i don't even want to mention their names in this entry... parang saying their names confirms the reality that they ARE going. whether we like it or not. they're leaving. and that's that.
...ate jali talked to me after the turnover about something. needless to say, it made me bawl my eyes out. i cried, and cried, and cried, and cried. from the moment our conversation ended to the time i got to myky's house in taytay where my barkada and i were gonna freshen up before we proceeded to eastwood. all the pent up emotions i've been keeping in check for the past few weeks exploded in a furious, and crazy-assed bawl fest. chelly called me in my cellie, and we talked for a few minutes on phone. she told me some pretty disturbing things, which then prompted me to call grant. i cried some more, paused for a while, and faced my kada. twas pretty hard to hide the fact that i was uber upset, since i've been crying for ages in front of 'em. and so, for the first time, i told them the whole gory story. from the _____ to the ______ to the ________. i talked for about five minutes, non stop, with sniffles and snotcraps in between. and afterwards, they each gave their opinion, and it was over. i asked them not to think of it personally anymore. since it wasn't an issue that involved the whole kada. i don't think it'd be right or fair for all of them to be angry or mad at some people just coz those people didn't exactly exhibit the epitome of sainthood towards me.
afta all the druh-ma bubuy (myky's uber asteeg drivah) arrived, and we headed out for eastwood. when we got there, stephie met up with jus-jus (her prom date), tasia met up with kit (this guy we met in the aa xavier interaction a.k.a. AXN), and myky met up with christian bernard alias ian (her uber bait and rockin bf). so medjo nahati ung barkada sa mga lovers and sa mga WHEELERS! yeah! i love my wheelers family! nica, cel, andy, and i didn't bring dates so we founded the wheelers family! yeah!!! SINGLE PEOPLE ROCK! mwahahaha... while the lovers in eastwood did... whatever it is that lovers do, the four of us had a KTV marathon and we sang our hearts and frustrations out. hehe... which was uber fun tah do coz the activity helped us all to release all the freakin stress and tension we've been feeling. the most memorable song we sang (duh), for me, would probably be SHE BANGS! yeah!! daig pa namin si william hung! mwahahaha... complete with the weird dance moves and pitchy voices! mwahahaha... after that we went to OJ's and did, whatever it is that youthful people do in OJ's (kung hindi mo alam, wag mo nang alamin! bwahahaha). we separated from jus-jus and stephie coz they needed some 'ALONE' time to talk about somethin. by the end of the night, nadagdagan na ang pangalan ni stephanie rose lucero sa mga nilalang na may ka MU. woohoo! i'm so happy for stephie! ang cute talaga nila ni jus-jus together!!!!!! bwahahahaha.
wednesday - hmm... just slept and yawned all day. talked to chellyfriend on the phone for hours and caught up with what was happening. isang malaking STONERS DAY.
thursday - i went with mutti, vatti, lola, and talia to meet up with some relatives in san pablo. grabe... we drove for 4 hours just to eat at max and talk to some old people. WEKEK. i am ZO MEAN. ansama ko! woohoo... but seriously, i got extreme butt cramps coz of that trip. if dad wasn't such a reckless driver, i'd have died of boredom.
today - we went to las pinas to visit my cuzns and grandma. we took hazel home with us so that talia would have a play mate. GREAT. MORE KIDDIES TO BULLY. mwahahaha... nah... i lovie my sissy and coussyn!
i'm really happy that ate cheska and mutti have buried the hatchet already. GRABE. HINDI RIN NAMAN KASI MADALING TUMIRA SA ISANG BAHAY NA PINANGYAYARIHAN NG WORLD WAR III! boo-yah! oh well... i hope ate feels better soon. sana enjoy kaming lahat when we go to banahaw, sagada, and baguio. can't wait! UKAY POWER!!!
i miss my barkada, i miss friend, and i miss the tropa! grabe... the only thing that sucks about summer is that i can't be with my buds every single day. grr! ahaaay... ang corny ko! CHEESE-DOM! keso keso!
mwahahaha...
high points of the day:
1) checked my ym, saw an offline message from cams about some gig. one of the bands was: KILLINGCHINO. benta tsong. benta! mwahahaha....
2)passing by quiapo... i saw this sign board i passed aeons ago. it said: this way to timberland! gawd... i am zo zo laughable.
3)passing by the jollybee joint near luneta park. suddenly had nostalgia pangs... i miss my uncle dan...
4)GETTING A 16700 score in this new game i have in my cellie! bwahaha... isa akong mababaw na nilalang... zadly, i am aware of this fact!
5)finally being able to make my posts appear in this blog! woohoo! finally finished the basic stuff with changing my templato...
6)getting to catch up with stephie and nica. can't wait to see em on monday! can't wait to go to shang too! summer shopping!!! kahit walang pera!!!
i have a strong resolve. i no longer give a flying fudge about that issue that made me bawl out. they say you can't satisy everyone. well, this time, i really am not gonna do anything about it anymore. coz when you've given something your all, everything you've got... and it doesn't work. what else is there to give? what happens next?
"I'll leave my fears behind..." -Broken Sonnet by Hale
*i'm leaving my fears behind bebe!!!!
*deng, still cannot believe that these guys are pnoy. grabe. galing talaga ng noypi. pang internasyonal na ang ka-astigan.
definitely no longer searching for utopia, an ergaslophobic student and aspiring thespian, a true blue Filipina and Assumptionist, existing in a state of utter discombobulation, *BROKE*, and fattening myself up in time for the next human sacrifice ritual in tondo, manila...
Stars and Nebulas
aLi
bea
cathy
caMs
[[twinstaR]]
[[fRienD]]
kaTrina
gaDDi
iSSa
jOnesie
[[myky]]
[[nica]]
pam
[[stephie]]
synty
[[tasia]]
trizza
wissa
Flight
Alanis Morissette
Carbon Stereoxide Studio Notes
Cold Play
Dashboard Confessional
Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind
Haruki Murakami
Milk&Cereal
Miss Saigon
Paulo Coelho
Rent - the Musicale
Shawn Mullins
System of a Down
The Simpsons
The Sims
The Used
::Credits::
Image By:
|j3concepts|
Layout By:
|Niknoi|
||December 2004
|January 2005
|February 2005
|March 2005
|April 2005
|May 2005
|June 2005
==:::A Few Friendly Reminders from your Resident Sane Psycho:::==
life is an unequivocally fast paced string of events, where the essence of a lifetime can be captured in a single breath, love can develop in a second, and where a long journey can feel like just another ride in the metro rail...
so put on your pink tinted glasses, wear your cheesiest smile. life's too short and much too precious to waste with the frivolities of a shallow existence.
let's limbo!
change is the only constant thing in life.
though it is most difficult to cope with change, we must.
it is survival. it is evolution.
but then again,
what if this change is brought about by paranormal sensations and emotions, unforeseen circumstances, hormonal imbalances, and... the weather?
what if this change is caused by things that are not things. forces that are immaterial?
how do we cope?
how do we end the relentless and crazed see-saw of intense emotions churning deep within us?
how do we stop misery?
how do we prolong happiness?
with a four millimeter bullet?
with a cup of peppermint-tasting cyanide?
with prayer?
i don't know.
i can't even begin to pretend to know, or to comprehend.
and i'm sure,
neither can you.
and it scares me.
it scares us.
that this we cannot understand.
everything else --science, mathematics, ratios, proportions, wars, peace talks, chocolate sprinkles and gum drops, ponies and rabbits, Nobel awards-- we know.
but this,
this simple shift of light and darkness,
this slight distinction,
this sudden rearranging of matter, molecules, and sensations.
this indescribable phenomena.
this we cannot even begin to grasp.
illogical, senseless, strange, odd.
fleeting, momentous, gargantuan, colossal.
what is the meaning behind this change in mood? in feeling?
what is the real root? the common cause?
perhaps we have been doomed to be this way.
to not understand.
to be left in the dark.
doomed to be able to adapt with everything else but this simple swing.
this simplistic issue.
never to find a way to evolve around it.
but perhaps.... in this case,
evolution is not survival.
for if you can just grin and bear it.
take it for what it is.
let go of the logic behind it.
perhaps then, survival is possible.
change is not imperative.
accepting is a prerogative, the answer, the key.